How to Be (Really) Heard By Your Doctor
BY BETHANY HEITMAN
Have you ever felt like your doctor isn’t listening to you? Maybe they spend so little time with you, you feel like you can’t get your questions in. Or perhaps you try to say something and they interrupt you. Sadly, you may be on to something. A study that was published in the Journal of General Internal Medicine found that when patients are explaining the reason for their visit, doctors only listen for an average of 11 seconds before interrupting. Yes, really.
By no means do we want to villainize doctors. There are tons of fantastic medical pros out there. But the fact is, they’re often busy running from patient to patient. They may also want to help you, so they’ll jump in before you’re done. And, even if a doctor is willing to listen, you may feel intimidated asking the questions you want to. Or perhaps you avoid diving deeper into medical issues, scared of what the outcome could be.
Regardless of the reason, taking control of your health and learning to be your own advocate is important. That’s why we’ve rounded up the tips below to help you be heard by your doctor.
Photo by Patty Brito
Be Specific
The more information you arm your healthcare provider with, the better off you’ll be. It will also encourage deeper, more meaningful conversations. So, avoid answering questions with a simple yes or no.
Instead, answer questions with a narrative. For example, if a doctor asks if you’ve been sleeping well. Don’t just say no. Rather, explain what you do on evenings when you notice you don’t get good sleep.
Incorporating storytelling into answers is actually a tactic used by lawyers. They instruct their clients to do this because it helps a juror get a fuller picture of who that person is and what may be going on. The same can be applied to doctors. Plus, it slows down the conversation and allows you to spend more time together.
Ask Questions
While we’re talking about questions, you shouldn’t just be answering them. Make it a priority to ask questions, too. Your doctor isn’t a mind reader and they may not know what you don’t understand or what you still need to know. The below questions can help your appointment feel more successful:
“Can you explain what that means?” If you need clarification, pipe up. You should also feel free to repeat back what you think you heard. This can help the doctor ensure you understand correctly.
“What should I do if…?” Your doctor can only assess what is going on at the moment. But human nature has us constantly wondering about the what if’s. By asking what would happen if your condition changes or worsens, you’ll put some of this anxiety at ease.
“Why should I…?” If you are unclear on why a certain course of treatment has been recommended, bring that up. When you are more engaged in the decisions a doctor is making, you are more likely to follow the plan.
Admit You’re Nervous
Medical appointments have a tendency to get pretty clinical. Emotion is removed and it’s all about facts. For the most part, this is okay. But it can also make a visit to the doctor feel like a business transaction. And when you're feeling uncertain or scared, that can make things even more overwhelming.
One simple way to remove some of that? Make it a point to tell your doctor that you are feeling a little nervous. This simple admission can put a little humanity back into your visit and encourage the doctor to slow down and be more communicative.
By Bethany Heitman, Contributor
P.S. Remember that no matter what you're going through right now, you don't have to do it alone! There are others like you in our community, where we interact on a daily basis, fight our demons, share our victories, and watch over each other as friends and accountability partners.
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